Our new word of the day is "chemo coma". That's what I was in for days 2 through 5 after chemo treatment number 2. It's not as bad as it sounds, I just like the word. I slept for three days. Not a Rip VanWinkle sleep. I woke up and ate, used the bathroom and yeah that was about it. I did make myself go upstairs and get food, most of the time. I know that the movement is good for me, see mom? I do listen. Sometimes. But I would eat, give the food a few minutes to start digesting then go back to bed. Of all the side effects of chemo, this was certainly the easiest to deal with. I had a really nasty bout of nausea Thursday night after treatment. I just knew that if I could just throw up, I would feel so much better. But that never happened. Thankfully, modern medicine has provided me with Zofran. I took one, and I don't know if it cured the nausea or not, but it did make me sleep, which sometimes is just as good. When I woke up several hours later, the nausea had passed and I was hungry.
This time around, I ate pretty much whatever I wanted. Nothing seemed to bother my stomach. I have now completed 3 of my 8 treatments and so far I have been very lucky. My nausea has been almost non-existent, and I pretty much just go into chemo coma for 4 or 5 days and then I am fine until the next round. I also have some arthritic like pain in my knees and hips, but that is a common side effect of the meds I am given.
Not much has hanged since my last post, which is why I have posted much of anything for the last month. I still struggle with not being able to bear a child. I have yet another friend who is now 1 month pregnant. It's hard because I am so happy for her and her partner, but part of me wants to just sob and weep because that is something that I will never know. I know that Universe obviously has something else in mind for me, but right now, I don't have to like it. I am still working on coming to terms with this. It will just take some time.
I think that this short post will be all for now. It's bringing up too much for me to handle right now. Love and Light to you all.